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Tuesday, February 20, 2007

12 Steps To Overcoming Shyness With The Opposite Sex

Getting rid of your shyness may seem impossible but with a
little effort and the desire to be more outgoing with the
opposite sex then you can definitely overcome shyness. It is
important to know that the fears you feel when shyness hits you
is typically always much worse than the reality of the
situation.

1. Fake it until you make it! This is an infamous saying in the
sales world. In other words; mimic or act like someone whom you
admire. It is a great way to start teaching yourself new
behavioral habits.

2. Ask yourself why you are shy. Be honest with yourself. What
are your real fears? What do you think people see when they
talk with you? Answering these questions will help guide you
into separating reality with what you are mistakenly perceiving
it to be.

3. Work on building your self confidence. Yes, this will take
effort on your part by reading books on the subject or
listening to motivational tapes, but it works!

4. Learn how to use daily affirmations and positive mind
influence. Again, this takes work but the power to change your
shyness to confidence can come simply from saying things to
yourself every day like "I like myself!" or "I am a winner!"

5. This may sound silly but take time out alone to roleplay
situations that you get really nervous about. Pretend that you
are talking to that guy or girl that makes you shy. Be that
outgoing person that you wish to be. This roleplaying will send
messages to your sub-consciousness and help your inner-self
change.

6. Dress to impress even if nobody is looking. Iron those
clothes! Keep that hair neat! In other words, always look your
best. This does amazing things to help you feel better about
yourself and overcome shyness.

7. Start projects in life that make you feel good. Start a
personal project, totally clean up your house clutter and your
car. Work on a new hobby. How can these things help you with
overcoming shyness? Simple by working on things that make you
feel good produces a natural aphrodisiac that turns you on and
which indirectly turns on people around you.

8. Reprogram your mental definition of shyness. This goes along
the same lines as using daily affirmations or by reading self
help books. By changing your perception of shyness instead of
having a negative attachment to the word, you will then help
re-create your outlook on it.

9. Learn to take risks. How many times did you just want to go
up to someone and tell them how beautiful they were, or how
impressed they were. As a daily exercise do this: Each day of
the week go up to a total stranger and say something nice. It
could be something as innocent as complimenting a pretty girl
on her hair or a guy with his shirt. Do not worry about the
outcome, do not worry about what they say, just do it!

10. Combat your fears of rejections by realizing that everyone
gets rejected at one point or another, everyone! Learn not to
take rejection personally. Use it as a tool.

11. Be honest and up front!... tell people that you are shy up
front, be honest with them. You will not believe just how
nervous and shy the other person is as well.

12. Last but certainly not least... pray to God. Share your
shyness with God and ask as him for the strength and courage to
overcome it.

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